Well, this is a story I never thought I would write.

Why? Because, friends, this is America.

A New Jersey woman named Danielle Davies is a pretty big Bradley Cooper fan. Turns out they went to school together (and were in a play together), so she's decided to get his attention again by taking a carboard cutout of him with her everywhere. Really. She takes him to the grocery store, the mall, and on carousel rides. And then she posts the photos to her insane Instagram.

Davies says that she has reasons for this little project of hers. First, she says that she's going to make a book out of her adventures with cardboard Bradley, but she says that there are deeper reasons to it, too. According to her website:

Why? Because, friends, this is America. So why not? The fact is, while most of us don't actually live our lives with movie stars, many of us wish we did. If I want a life with Bradley Cooper, well, then...I'll just make one up.

This is just weird. This lady is pushing 40 and engaging in activities that are embarrassing to both her husband and her kids (who probably have no idea who the heck Bradley Cooper is).

Maybe I should start dragging that Bruno Mars cardboard cutout that's in my office around with me everywhere. We're probably soulmates.