Best. Weapon. Ever. Pretty good headline, too.

May 27th, Marshall Police were called for a domestic complaint at a gas station. A 76-year-old mom was arguing with her son, because he was supposed to take her to a nursing home, but was instead taking her to his place instead. First mom to ever be mad about NOT being sent to a nursing home, apparently.

The argument got really out of control, and I can say that with authority, because the woman ended the fight by throwing her cheeseburger at her 46-year-old son.

I'd have to be pretty pissed off to chuck my cheeseburger at someone. I'm eating that s***!

Police were forced to take her in for domestic assault charges.

Maybe it was a really crappy burger? Would White Castle be considered a deadly weapon? Well, maybe only if you ate it.

I guess I could understand if it was a Whataburger assault. Whataburgers are HUGE burgers, and it really is a crime to throw one at someone.

Dammit. Now I want a Whataburger.