Whatever 2.11
Your daily dose of whatever includes:
- More Olympic Coverage
- Sexy Famous People
- Celebrity Birthdays and Back in the Day
The U.S. Bobsledder Who Got Trapped in His Bathroom Just Got Trapped in an Elevator
On Saturday, an American bobsledder in Sochi named Johnny Quinn got TRAPPED in his bathroom, and had to SMASH his way through the door to get out. Well . . . maybe he should just stay perfectly still until it's time for him to compete.
Because yesterday, he got trapped AGAIN . . . this time in an elevator. He and two other bobsledders got trapped . . . but they had phones on them, so we're assuming they were rescued and got out without any property destruction. (Deadspin)
Photos of Olympic Stars as Kids
You probably haven't gotten a chance to know too many of the American Olympians competing in Sochi yet . . . but we've got pictures of them as kids.
Yahoo posted photos of some of our Winter Olympics athletes when they were young. You'll recognize some names, like Shaun White and Lolo Jones . . . and you'll probably get to know the other names over the next two weeks. (Yahoo)
The Russian Woman Who Lit the Olympic Torch and Once Tweeted a Racist Photo of the Obamas Says She Was Hacked
There was some controversy at the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, because the Russian figure skater who lit the Olympic flame once tweeted a racist photo of the OBAMAS. Originally, she said she wouldn't apologize. But yesterday she changed her mind, apologized, and even offered up the standard "I was hacked" defense.
(ABC News)
American Olympians Get $25,000 For Winning Gold, British Athletes Get Nothing, and Malaysians Would Get $600,000 If One Ever Won
Did you know American athletes get $25,000 for winning a gold medal, $15,000 for a silver, and $10,000 for a bronze? Every country sets its own payouts. Russia pays $113,200 plus bonuses for a gold . . . England pays ZERO for winning . . . and Malaysia WOULD pay $600,000 for a gold, only they haven't had anyone win one since 1956.
1. American athletes get $25,000 for winning a gold, $15,000 for a silver, and $10,000 for a bronze. Those payments have been the same for 10 years . . . which means, due to inflation, they're worth about $5,500 less than they used to be.
2. Canada pays $17,900 for a gold.
3. Russia pays WAY better . . . $113,200 for a gold, plus bonuses that can triple that.
4. England pays . . . nothing. A spokesman from their Olympic committee says, quote, "We believe that the drive, dedication, and commitment . . . is motivated first and foremost by the desire to represent their country to the best of their ability."
5. And finally, Malaysia offers the best prize in the world: A gold bar worth $600,000 for a gold medal. Unfortunately . . . no athlete from Malaysia has won a gold medal since 1956. (Yahoo Sports)
Twins Just Won Medals in the Same Event For Only the Second Time Ever
Yesterday, a Dutch Olympian named Michel Mulder won the gold medal in the men's 500-meter speed skating. And his TWIN brother, Ronald Mulder won bronze.
That's only the second time in Winter Olympics HISTORY that twins have won a medal competing against each other in the same event.
The only other time was 1984, in Sarajevo, when Phil and Steve Mahre from the U.S. won gold and silver in the slalom. (BBC)
Olympics Medal Count . . . The U.S. Ended Day Three in Fourth Place
The United States fell from third to fourth place at the Olympics yesterday. Skier Julia Mancuso won the bronze in the women's super-combined slalom, which was the only medal we picked up. But Canada nabbed two more golds and a silver and moved into first place.
Here are the standings as of the end of Monday's competition.
1. Canada with 7 medals . . . 3 Gold, 3 Silver, and 1 Bronze.
2. The Netherlands with 7 medals . . . 3 Gold, 2 Silver, and 2 Bronze.
3. Norway with 7 medals . . . 2 Gold, 1 Silver, and 4 Bronze.
4. The United States with 5 medals . . . 2 Gold and 3 Bronze.
5. Germany with 2 medals . . . both Gold. (Russia now has 6 medals, but only one of them is gold.)
The one bronze we picked up was won by Julia Mancuso in the women's super-combined slalom early yesterday morning. Meanwhile, Canada won gold and silver in the men's moguls and gold in men's speed skating.
(You can check the updated medal counts at NBCOlympics.com.)
Sexy Pictures of Famous People
1. Here's a gallery of 40 hot athletes in the Winter Olympics.
2. After recent, high-profile breakups, NINA DOBREV and LIAM HEMSWORTH might be hooking up. They were spotted together at an Atlanta bar called the Corner Tavern on Friday night.
Nina recently split with IAN SOMERHALDER, and Liam used to date MILEY CYRUS.
3. KATY PERRY had some visible panty lines in an old-school pair of sweats.
4. Something tells me you'd like to see JARED LETO successfully flip a huge vegan pancake two times.
5. Sometimes it's better NOT to ask questions. Like when CHANNING TATUM posts a picture of himself writing the "Magic Mike 2" screenplay with a life-size bust of MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY on the desk in front of him.
6. Even less of COURTNEY STODDEN is real. She just got her lips pumped up.
7. JONAH HILL planted one on his MALE friend during the Lakers Kiss Cam.
Samuel L. Jackson Mocked a Reporter for Confusing Him with Laurence Fishburne
SAMUEL L. JACKSON went off on a reporter who confused him with LAURENCE FISHBURNE during an interview yesterday. He was mostly joking, and it's possible the reporter DIDN'T confuse them after all, but he did rake the guy over the coals for it.
He said there's, quote, "more than one black guy doing a commercial," and clarified that he's the "What's in your wallet black guy" . . . while Fishburne is the "car black guy." Then he talked about the OTHER black guys he's not, including MORGAN FREEMAN.
Chris Kattan Was Busted for DUI . . . And There's Video of His Failed Sobriety Test
CHRIS KATTAN was busted for DUI early yesterday morning in L.A., after he veered onto a closed section of a highway and smashed into a construction truck. Supposedly he admitted he was on prescription drugs, and there's video of his failed field sobriety test online.
O.J. Simpson for President? Nine Magazine Predictions That Went Horribly Wrong
A collection of old magazine predictions that didn't pan out includes M. Night Shyamalan being touted as "The Next Spielberg", Billy Ray Cyrus raising his teen daughter Miley "The Right Way", and O.J. Simpson as a possible presidential contender.
Is Kristen Stewart's Poetry Any Good? You Be the Judge
KRISTEN STEWART shared an original poem in "Marie Claire" magazine. It's called "My Heart is a Wiffle Ball / Freedom Pole" . . . and we want to know . . . Is it any good?
My Heart Is A Wiffle Ball / Freedom Pole
I reared digital moonlight
You read its clock, scrawled neon across that black
Kismetly . . . ubiquitously crest fallen
Thrown down to strafe your foothills
. . . I'll suck the bones pretty.
Your nature perforated the abrasive organ pumps
Spray painted everything known to man,
Stream rushed through and all out into
Something Whilst the crackling stare down sun snuck
Through our windows boarded up
He hit your flint face and it sparked.
And I bellowed and you parked
We reached Marfa.
One honest day up on this freedom pole
Devils not done digging
He's speaking in tongues all along the pan handle
And this pining erosion is getting dust in
My eyes
And I'm drunk on your morsels
And so I look down the line
Your every twitch hand drum salute
Salutes mine . . .
John Elway and Robert Kraft Are Cool With a Gay NFL Player . . . But Some Unidentified Team Personnel Say It Won't Work
Patriots owner ROBERT KRAFT and Broncos exec JOHN ELWAY are cool with the possibility of a gay player, like NFL prospect MICHAEL SAM. But on condition of anonymity, some team employees don't think the league is ready for it.
Tuesday's TV Reminders:
• "Olympics Coverage" . . . from 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. on NBC. Shaun White attempts his third straight gold in halfpipe snowboarding. Tuesday's other events include the women's ski jumping and slopestyle skiing, and the pairs figure skating.
• "The 138th Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show" . . . 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. on USA.
• "Dads" [1st Season Finale] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox.
Tonight's Late Night Talk Shows:
Olympics Note: "Jimmy Fallon" and "Carson Daly" are pre-empted for Olympic coverage all week. Jimmy takes over on "The Tonight Show" on February 17th and Seth Meyers assumes the reins of "Late Night" on the 24th.
• "Letterman" - Scarlett Johannson and John Grant. (Repeat)
• "Jimmy Kimmel" - Gary Oldman ("Robocop"). Music Guest: Crosses †††.
• "Arsenio" - Mekhi Phifer ("House of Lies") and the cast of "Hardcore Pawn".
• "Conan" - Joel Kinnaman, Aubrey Plaza, Toni Braxton and Babyface Edmonds.
• "Craig Ferguson" - Jason Alexander and Regina Hall.
• "Chelsea Lately" - A look a Fashion Week.
• "Jon Stewart" - Elizabeth Kolbert, "The Sixth Extinction: An Unnatural History".
• "The Colbert Report" - Charlie Crist talks about running for governor in Florida.
"Ender's Game" is Out on DVD and "House of Cards" Returns on Friday
Here's what's new on DVD today:
• "Ender's Game" . . . starring Asa Butterfield and Harrison Ford.
• "All is Lost" . . . starring Robert Redford as a guy lost at sea.
• "Diana" . . . starring Naomi Watts as Princess Diana.
• "The Anna Nicole Story" starring Agnes Bruckner as Anna Nicole Smith.
• "The Armstrong Lie" . . . a documentary about Lance Armstrong's doping.
• The first season of Keri Russell's KGB thriller "The Americans".
• The second season of the new "Dallas", which includes J.R.'s funeral.
• The third season of "Sherlock", which explains how he faked his own death.
Some other movies hitting DVD that you may not have seen include:
• "Jewtopia" where a guy pretends to be Jewish for the love of Jennifer Love Hewitt.
• "Life of a King". It stars Cuba Gooding Jr. as an ex-con who starts a chess club.
• The "Best Man" sequel "Best Man Holiday", with Morris Chestnut and Taye Diggs.
• "The Counselor" . . . with Michael Fassbender, Penelope Cruz and Cameron Diaz.
• "Haunter", which stars Abigail Breslin as a teenage ghost trying to save a living girl.
New DVDs, Games, and Netflix (continued)
Here's what's coming up this week on Netflix Instant Streaming:
• The second season of "House of Cards" hits Netflix on Friday.
And here's what's new in the exciting world of video games:
• "Lightning Returns: Final Fantasty XIII" on the Xbox360 and PS3
New CDs Include an "American Idol" Concept Album and the "Girls" Soundtrack
• "Samson and Delilah", Ace Young and Diana DeGarmo. A concept album from your favorite married "American Idol" rejects, telling a Broadway musical version of the story.
• "Dizzy Heights", Neil Finn of Crowded House
• The second soundtrack album from HBO's "Girls", which they gave the lengthy title of "Girls Volume 2: All Adventurous Women Do". It includes music from Lily Allen, Vampire Weekend, Christina Perri, M. Ward, Oasis, Beck, and Aimee Mann.
• "Disney Channel Play It Loud", with pop music from "Jessie" star Debby Ryan, "A.N.T. Farm" star China Anne McClain, "Liv & Maddie" star Dove Cameron, "Shake It Up" stars Zendaya and Bella Thorne, and the annoying cast of "Austin & Ally".
• "From Another World: A Tribute To Bob Dylan" . . . musicians from countries like Cuba, India, Romania, Iran, Egypt, Taiwan, and Australia perform Bob Dylan songs.
• "Young Heart", the second album by Blondfire (SoundCloud)
• "Lo-Fantasy", the Canadian group Sam Roberts Band (Album Stream)
• "Real Hair", an EP from Speedy Ortiz (Album Stream)
• "Sun Structures", the debut album by the British psychedelic rock group Temples (SoundCloud) (Album Stream)
• "Let's Go Extinct", the British indie band Fanfarlo (SoundCloud)
• "Wheel of Talent", The Fleshtones (Album Stream)
• "Kindly Bent to Free Us", Cynic. The third album from these prog rockers hits stores on FRIDAY, February 14th. (Album Stream)
• "Benji", Sun Kil Moon. It WAS named after the 1974 dog movie. The singer says, "This record is filled with so much darkness, I wanted to give it a light title, for contrast. 'Benji' is a great movie, one of my favorites." (???)
• "The Outsiders", country singer Eric Church (Album Stream)
• "Sunshine & Whiskey", country singer Frankie Ballard
• "Acoustic at the Ryman", Band of Horses (Album Stream)
• "Small Town Heroes", Hurray For The Riff Raff (Album Stream)
Five Random Valentine's Day Facts . . . Why You Should Double Date, Walk Around Naked, and Buy a Juicer
Here are some random stats about Valentine's Day: Couples are more likely to walk around the house NUDE than single people . . . 10% of people are thinking about calling an ex on Valentine's Day . . . and the two gifts women want the most for Valentine's Day are a juicer and a Keurig coffee maker.
1. Have you considered a DOUBLE DATE for Valentine's Day? A new study out of Wayne State University in Michigan found double dates can strengthen your relationship because it helps you see your significant other in a new light.
2. You'd think people living alone would spend ALL their time naked . . . but a new survey found COUPLES are more likely to walk around the house nude than single people. 45% of couples do it, compared to 35% of single people.
3. 10% of people are thinking about calling an ex on Valentine's Day.
4. A new poll says your wife or girlfriend might want an APPLIANCE for Valentine's Day. But it has to be the RIGHT appliance . . . not, like, a vacuum cleaner. The two gifts women want the most are a JUICER and a Keurig coffee maker.
5. A happy marriage gives you as much satisfaction as an extra $105,000-a-year in income. Having your spouse die feels the same as losing $308,780-a-year.
Five Valentine's Day Myths Debunked
Here are some Valentine's Day myths debunked: It's not the best day for PROPOSING . . . 40% of women think that's too cliché. Flowers don't have to come from your significant other . . . 10% of people have sent themselves flowers on Valentine's Day. And women AREN'T needier than men.
1. Women are needier than men. On Valentine's Day, about half of single men say they'd rather be in a dead-end relationship than alone.
2. Flowers have to come from your significant other. 10% of people have sent THEMSELVES flowers on Valentine's Day.
3. Valentine's Day is the best day for proposing. 40% of women think it's a cliché to propose on Valentine's Day.
4. Sex has to be "different" on Valentine's Day. 62% of men believe Valentine's sex has to be better . . . maybe new lingerie or a new location. Women are the OPPOSITE . . . and believe it's a good day to keep things traditional and intimate.
5. If your relationship survives until Valentine's Day you're good. You might think it's cruel to break up with someone before Valentine's Day, but this might be even CRUELER . . . 25% of people say they'd wait until February 15th to end things.
The Four-Part Scientific Recipe For a Happy Couple
Science has figured out the recipe for a HAPPY COUPLE. The key is to have five positive interactions for every ONE negative interaction. Positive interactions are things like reacting well to the other person's good news, giving them compliments, showing appreciation, and doing nice things.
1. Happy couples have five positive interactions for every ONE negative interaction. Couples who wind up divorced have 0.8 positive interactions for every negative one.
Positive interactions are things like giving a compliment . . . showing your appreciation . . . reminiscing about a good memory or reliving it . . . and just doing something nice for the other person.
2. But the MOST important positive interaction is reacting well to the other person's GOOD NEWS. When they have good news, you need to be enthusiastic, ask questions, congratulate them, and relive the experience with them.
3. The happiest couples have sex two to three times a week.
4. And finally, when you get into an argument, the key to staying happy is to both CONCEDE on certain points and see the other person's point of view.
(Happify)
Five Random Facts For Tuesday
1. The first recorded use of the F-word in human history was in 1528, when a monk wrote it in the margins of a book to express how much he disliked an abbot.
2. The Harlem Globetrotters were founded in Chicago. Their offices are now in Phoenix, Arizona. They've never been headquartered anywhere in New York . . . let alone Harlem.
3. In ancient Greece, the ideal male genitalia was SMALL and THIN. It's not clear when that changed and large junk became a status symbol.
4. The Bechdel Test is a test on a movie to see whether it has at least two female characters with names who talk to each other about something besides a man. And only 56% of movies studied pass the test.
5. The official bird of the city of Redondo Beach, California is . . . the Goodyear Blimp.
(io9 / Wikipedia / Glamour / Bechdel Test / Redondo.org)
What's the Worst Drunk Text You've Ever Sent?
1. "I met a girl, got her number, then drunkenly decided to wander home. I texted her, 'Sorry I had to go, I have to go work on the farm tomorrow.' I have never been on a farm in my life and have no idea why I sent that. Never heard back from her."
2. "I sent a photo of a naked transgender woman . . . who still had her male parts . . . to a girl. I wrote, 'This made me think of you.' I'm still trying to figure out why."
3. "I drunkenly texted my friend Pete trying to get some weed at 1:00 A.M. He wrote back, 'I really can't help you with that.' The next morning I realized I hadn't sent it to my friend Pete . . . I sent it to my dad's coworker Pete."
4. "I accidentally sent a message to my elderly grandmother telling her I wanted to eff her brains out. I'm a girl. I made a gracious surprise visit to her the next day to delete it from her phone before she could see it."
5. "I came home drunk and wanted to text a bunch of different girls. I tried writing, 'Hey, haven't spoken in ages! I miss you, let's meet up soon' to eight different girls . . . but accidentally put all nine of us in one big group text." (Reddit)
The Latest in Inappropriate Selfies Is . . . Selfies With Homeless People
One day, the punk kids of the world are going to realize there are moments that AREN'T appropriate for selfies.
We've already seen websites that collect photos of selfies at inappropriate places and selfies at funerals.
And now, the newest collection of horrible selfies is . . . Selfies With Homeless People. It's just what you'd expect.
Taylor Lautner is 22. Jacob Black in the "Twilight" movies AND Sharkboy in "The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl".
Q'orianka Kilcher is 24. Pocahontas in Colin Farrell's "The New World". She's also Jewel's cousin. Her father is Peruvian and her mother is Swiss. No doubt their lovemaking was sweet . . . and VERY taboo.
Aubrey O'Day is 30. Former Danity Kane harlot.
Natalie Dormer is 32. Margaery Tyrell on "Game of Thrones", Moriarty on "Elementary", and Cressida in the next "Hunger Games" movie.
She got naked on screen as Anne Boleyn in "The Tudors" and still disrobes frequently on "Game of Thrones".
Kelly Rowland is 33. Destiny's Child. There've been some rumors that she does NOT shave under her arms.
Matthew Lawrence is 34. Matt Donovan on "Gimme a Break!", starring NELL CARTER! More importantly . . . he's JOEY LAWRENCE'S little brother! Joey hooked him up with "Dancing with the Stars" minx Cheryl Burke, but it didn't last.
Brandy IS "Moesha" and today she turns 35. She was never charged over that fatal car crash she allegedly caused back in December of 2006 . . . but she supposedly settled a multimillion-dollar civil suit with the family of the woman who died in the wreck.
Mike Shinoda is 37. Linkin Park and Fort Minor MC.
Cherokee is a Nubian mattress actress who's done 148 fine films, including "Slippin' Into Darkness", "Flava of Lust" and "Charlie Macc & the Big Butt Chocolate Factory". She's 38 today.
Brice Beckham is 38. WESLEY ON "MR. BELVEDERE"!
Isaiah Mustafa is 40. The black superstar of the Old Spice commercials! NOW LOOK AT ME.
D'Angelo is 40. Very sexy Nubian superstar singer.
Damian Lewis is 43. Nicholas Brody, the rescued American POW who is a terrorist working for Al Qaeda on Showtime's "Homeland".
Jennifer Aniston is 45. Way hotter than Angelina. I don't care what anybody says. If you don't agree, watch her stripping scenes in "We're the Millers".
P.J. Sparxx is a blonde mattress actress who's starred in 280 fine films, including . . . "Sinderella", "Quantum Deep" and "Muffy the Vampire Layer". She's 45 today.
Sarah Palin is 50. Former Governor of Alaska. John McCain picked her as his running mate for the 2008 presidential election. After they lost, she was never heard from again.
Sheryl Crow is 52. Did she know Lance was doping?
Jeb Bush is 61. 2016?
Burt Reynolds is 78. He slaps people during interviews sometimes.
Tina Louise is 80. Ginger on "Gilligan's Island". Tina is one of only TWO of the original seven castaways who are still with us. Dawn "Mary Ann" Wells is 74 . . . and we just lost Russell "The Professor" Johnson last month.
LESLIE NIELSEN! (1926 - 2010)
Bobby "Boris" Pickett (1938 - 2007) "The Monster Mash"!
Eva Gabor (1919 - 1995) Lisa Douglas on "Green Acres"! She was Zsa Zsa's lil sister.
Thomas Edison (1847 - 1931)
Countdown to Upcoming Events
• 3 days to Valentine's Day
• 6 days to Fallon's "Tonight Show"
• 13 days until "The Voice" returns
• 19 days to the Oscars
• 26 days to Daylight Savings
• 1,074 days left of "Hope and Change"
261 years ago . . . in 1752 - The FIRST HOSPITAL IN AMERICA opened in Philadelphia . . . thanks to BEN FRANKLIN, who raised most of the money to build it.
55 years ago . . . in 1958 - Ruth Carol Taylor took her first flight as a stewardess . . . becoming the FIRST BLACK STEWARDESS. (Although now, we must refer to her as an "African-American flight attendant.")
48 years ago . . . in 1965 - RINGO STARR married the very lucky Maureen Cox. They divorced in 1975 . . . probably so that Ringo could resume tapping his many Japanese groupies. He's HUGE in Japan, you know.
(Ringo married the very sexy Barbara Bach in 1981. They're still married, and she's STILL sexy.)
29 years ago . . . in 1984 - THE GENESIS CLASSIC "THAT'S ALL" PEAKED AT #6 ON THE POP CHART.
27 years ago . . . in 1986 - BOY GEORGE guest-starred on an "A-Team" episode called "COWBOY GEORGE".
23 years ago . . . in 1990 - NELSON MANDELA WAS FREED FROM PRISON AFTER 27 YEARS.
23 years ago . . . in 1990 - BUSTER DOUGLAS, a 35-to-1 underdog with a large, Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade float-sized head, knocked out MIKE TYSON in the 10th round to win the Undisputed Heavyweight Championship.
20 years ago . . . in 1993 - The very erotic JANET RENO was appointed Attorney General by randy President Clinton. Janet Reno was the first female to hold the position . . . AND the sexiest.
8 years ago . . . in 2005 - O.J.'s brother, 58-year-old MELVIN LEON SIMPSON, was involved in a FATAL freeway crash in San Francisco.
7 years ago . . . in 2006 - DICK CHENEY "accidentally" shot his quail hunting partner, 78-year-old Harry Whittington, in the face. He did not die.
One year ago . . . in 2012 - WHITNEY HOUSTON died in her hotel bathtub the night before the Grammys. The coroner's report ruled her death an accidental drowning, but also listed cocaine use and heart disease as contributing factors. She was only 48.
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