Intern Connor’s Roommate Horror Stories
Today's Text Question of the Day was inspired because of intern Connor's awful roommate at Ball State this past year. This led to lots of terrifying stories from the Clique of Six about their roommates. But we didn't want to look over the source of this text question. The one, the only Ethan of Ball State University. Here are some of the horror stories Connor had to live through.
- He lost his room key for over a month, forcing us to leave our room open and unlocked all day long, leaving all of our stuff (including expensive things like laptops!) vulnerable to theft. He refused to buy a new key until I got the RA involved.
- He would talk in his sleep, but it wasn't any language I could recognize. It must have been either gibberish or a made-up language.
- He would take "naps" late at night, say from 10:00 pm to 12:00 am. When his alarm went off, he would, of course, sleep through it. I had to listen to his alarm at midnight when I had to wake up for my job at 5:00 am.
- He would leave food like macaroni and cheese and sandwiches out for a month at a time. Our room smelled so bad that my friends wouldn't come into my room.
- His friends would come in and try to wake him up (of course he didn't) while I was sleeping until I made them leave and then they’d leave the door wide open, so I'd have to get out of bed just to close the door.
- He would snore so loud that I would scream at him, turn on the room light, point lamps right in his face, set off my alarm and finally when nothing else worked, I would get on my bed and SLAM the mattress trying to make noise.
- He would take my lamps and and set them up on his side of the room while I was gone. He wouldn't give them back or ask permission so I would have to put them back myself. Eventually, I had to lock them every time I went home.
- He was on the bowling team, so we had at least eight bowling balls in the room at all times. Which would be fine, but he placed them right in the doorway so I would always slam my foot into the bowling balls when I walked in.
- This is the worst of the worst. When Ethan would have a bit too much to drink, he would, as many do, throw up while he was in bed. But the thing was he didn't reach for a trash or anything. He would just puke in a forward direction and it would hit whatever happened to be in that direction. To make things worse he wouldn't clean it up until late morning or early afternoon the next day. He one time puked on my swimsuit and then rinsed it out and hung it on my bed. Without telling me what had happened until I had to question him why my swimsuit was on the bedpost. The story he had told me was that he hadn't barfed on my stuff. Of course, it turns out that he did barf on my swimsuit and he had "rinsed it out in the sink" so according to him it was just fine. Yeah, that suit went int he dirty clothes.
Since I'm moving into MSU in less than a week, you could say I'm nervous about getting another randomly assigned roommate, but we will have to see what comes of it. You'll be sure I'm going to update Connie and Fish on the status of my roommate.