Marriage. Isn’t easy. You know that right? If you don’t know that you have never been married. Seriously. If it has always been easy for you then you are a Unicorn. We thought it would be cool to get a bunch of advice from members of the Click of 6 on this topic so we made it the TQOTD.

TEXT QUESTION OF THE DAY:
What’s something you think everyone should know before they get married?

  • Match the important values! Like, kids or no kids? How often to see other family, budgeting.
  • Eat cereal together
  • It probably won't last due to social media. People get bored. That's both men and women. When problems arise in a marriage, either party or both may get on social media to get the attention they are looking for and that leads to cheating spouses then divorce then child custody disputes. It's much easier for a woman to cheat in my opinion. I say don't get married unless you know the person and can make a life time commitment. A person who flirts will seek unneeded attention in a marriage. Be cautious. Or just be happy and single and use birth control. It will save you lots of headaches and money.
  • Marriage is a lot harder than I think people realize. Discuss family matters, like if someone from their family disrespects you, your spouse better stand up for you (unless you're in the wrong obviously). Also, having personal space and alone time is crucial!!
  • Good communication
  • Get a prenuptial
  • Compromise is important; listen to each other and never go to bed angry.
  • Respect!
  • Just like anything you want to be successful, it takes hard work.
  • Marriage is all about compromising with each other. Everyone screws up so You have to know how to say "I'm Sorry".
  • Get premarital counseling. Well worth the time and energy.
  • be honest about having kids or not. talk about finances. Cover the hard stuff, the deal breakers. Be honest.
  • It is work. It doesn’t function on auto pilot. It changes. It is good and bad and that is all ok
  • Cuddling is a lie. Invest in separate beds or at least a king size and cooling sheets/pillow
  • If that person/s cheated before!
  • Pick a couple household chores and just own them. “Sharing” those jobs doesn’t work. If you’re the better cook, you’re the cook now. Like laundry? Sort those colors baby!
  • Don’t just listen to hear. Always listen to understand.
  • It’s not a fairytale, it’s real life. It’s harder than anything you’ve ever done before...BUT one of the most rewarding things ever if you work through the hard times.
  • The good, bad and ugly.
  • Love don’t pay the bills
  • You should talk extensively about your life goals and expectations from the relationship. Be clear about what you want.
  • Selfless acts of love earn you selfless acts of love. You can't take all the time without giving back.
  • ALWAYS take 15 minutes per day doesn’t matter what time, to communicate even if it’s hi honey how are you and actually listen to how they are feeling. No talking about money or kids. Trust...this is a must
  • It takes work and lots of patience! Don't give up so easy.
  • Every day isn’t sunshine. It is truly a COMMITMENT. Some days are just plain hard ....but the next day is always a new beginning. And...it’s worth it!!!! Can’t imagine not having my husband. 27 years this month.
  • It's work. It's growing together and being okay and supportive of each other's growth. It's loving each other through the hard and angry times. Showing affection and that you care in ways that feel good to the other person even if it's uncomfortable or unnatural feeling for you. It's so many things and it takes two with good intentions and open communication.
  • Find someone that you want to learn and grow with. I’m 35 and I’ve been with my husband for 19 years, married for 10 years in June. We still date and are learning about each other all the time. It’s a journey. If it isn’t something that you intend to grow and change with, wait a little longer.
  • You want to know the secret of a happy marriage. DON'T BE SELFISH. It's not about YOU anymore. If you truly love your partner, your biggest concern should be THEIR happiness, not yours. I've been married for 23 years now and my wife and I NEVER fight about anything.
  • Communication is HUGE! Just like any relationship it takes work & a marriage is like a full time job. Make time for each other.
  • I think that you should know exactly what you want in life and what goals you want to achieve and make sure that the person you want to be with is someone that would support you when achieving those goals and not have conflicting goals.
  • Marriage is / ....talk, pray, be each other's best friend, don't keep secrets ... Always say " I love you" .. you can be upset with each other and still Love each other ....Always kiss Goodnight …
  • Give commitment, be sure to communicate and compromise. Be honest, and yelling resolves nothing.
  • Don’t do it. Just run.
  • Sleeping with someone else is frowned upon
  • Everything in life worthwhile takes hard work. Marriage is one of those things!
  • Talk about your issues. Sweeping things under the rug to avoid conflict will create worse problems than the original ones.
  • Always have an alternate plan. You never truly know a person until you divorce them.
  • Have your own blankets in bed, and a king size or bigger bed!! Marriage isn't always rainbows and butterflies. When mad don't go to sleep angry
  • Know that who you're marrying has to be your best friend. Gottsta be BFFS 1st.
  • Be ready to compromise but let him know who wears the pants in the relationship. LOL!
  • Pre marriage and financial counseling, most marriages that end in divorce are over finances
  • Sit in bad traffic for a few hours. If you get through it without a bad word to each other...you're NOT fit for marriage. Because one of you is holding back and that is not reality ....
  • Don’t expect the other person to know what you’re thinking
  • Everyone should live with their significant other for a year before marrying. You don't have to have balloon animals but you should know all of those idiosyncrasies that can annoy you and make you resent one another.
  • Who you are today is who you are after you’re married. Marriage will not or should not be a reason for a change. Love the person the same after as you did before!
  • It’s ok not to get married, marriage isn’t for everyone.
  • The person you marry will never "complete" you. You are both complete on your own. If you expect another person to make you feel whole, you are setting them up to fail. Accept yourself as you are and accept them as they are and you will have a happy relationship.
  • How to drive a manual transmission. It takes practice, a gentle hand, a sense of feel, and attentiveness. All those things you need to be a good partner to someone.
  • Don’t rush into marriage! Both U & your partner will grow & change as the years go by. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Give second chances. Go on dates often. & hold hands. Take good care of yourself, so that U can care for your partner. Communication, talk & listen, & agree to disagree sometimes. Write love letters, even if that is just a paper with a heart on it for your partner to find. What U say, isn’t always as important as how U say it. Life is not perfect, neither is marriage, but honestly, respect, and humor goes a long way.

CHECK IT OUT: Signs of Hope Around West Michigan